WELCOME HEART: Living a Legacy Life

Ep 219 How Food and the Table Helps Defeat Loneliness with Kendall Vanderslice

Kendall Vanderslice joins us today to talk bread, food, community, and loneliness—all some of my favorite topics. Founder of the non-profit,  EdibleTheology.com, Kendall shares her wisdom regarding cultural polarization, and how eating together is a vulnerable and soul-filling activity. I love her call to include "rhythms of times at the table" in an effort to stave off our default into isolation. And, that when we do, we feel more known, respected and healed.
Author of We Will Feast, By Bread Alone, as well as the digital course, Bake With the Bible, Kendall also promotes a program we can use in our churches to build community and love, even in the middle of an election year! (Maybe especially in the middle of an election year!) And she is offering a copy of her recently released book/memoir: By Bread Alone: A Baker's Reflections on Hunger, Longing and the Goodness of God.
Some gems from our conversation:
To eat together takes vulnerability at some level which leads to deeper sharing and better knowing of one another.
Loneliness has negative effects on our brains and our bodies. 
God speaks to us in the act of cooking and eating.
Healing is possible around the table. Pull up a chair.
Sharing stories and meals can fill gaps and foster connections unlike any other thing.
Invite others into your home on purpose when it's not all cleaned up and perfect.
We can love better when we don't agree on topics when we cook and eat together. 
To stave off loneliness, purpose to plan your life around rhythms of eating at the table with others.
Her favorite thing to bake (I asked!) is "Sourdough on Training Wheels." Sounds like my kind of sourdough.
In her own words
Hello! I’m Kendall Vanderslice – yes, before you ask, that is my true name.
It’s just by chance (or the humor of God) that I ended up in a field so fitting. I’m a baker and writer, whose best thinking occurs as I work dough between my hands; I scribble down thoughts on pieces of parchment dusted in flour, until I can parse them out later before my keyboard. When I embarked on a career as a pastry chef, I found that my love of bread transformed the ways I read scripture. Fascinated by God’s use of food throughout the arc of the Gospel, I merged my work in the kitchen with academic study of food and theology.
I founded the educational nonprofit Edible Theology as an outlet for further research and public engagement in this sphere. You can get a taste for our work by listening to our weekly podcast Kitchen Meditations.
I’m a graduate of Wheaton College in Illinois (BA Anthropology), where I began engaging questions of food and faith. Interested in commensality—or, the social dynamics of eating together—I studied food at Boston University (MLA Gastronomy). My thesis on church meals sparked a range of theological questions, leading me to Duke University where I wrote a thesis on the theology of bread (MTS). In 2018 I was named a James Beard Foundation national scholar for my work on food and religion.
My first book, We Will Feast: Rethinking Dinner, Worship, and the Community of God, released May 2019. My second book, By Bread Alone: A Baker’s Reflections on Hunger, Longing, and the Goodness of God, releases February 2023.
 
 

Ep 218 The Value and Joy of Coming Alongside Young Adults with Dianne Beck

A teacher told Dianne Beck, "You're a good writer" and that made all the difference. Beck's love of writing turned into a passion, first while teaching non-reading junvenile delinquents, then teaching in a Christian school and now writing young adult fiction. She inspired her students to write and they made her accountable to finishing her first novel, Sticks and Stones—a prequel to her current book, Finding True North. Beck explores the theme of living from our true identity, who God designed us to be. And she is giving away a copy this week!
Leave a comment below to be entered. You'll want to read it first and then give it to your favorite 8th grader!
Dianne's legacy is love: "When you read my stories, real or imagined, may you discover a God who loves you." 
 
Dianne, a mother of four adult children has taught school for years and has a special spot in her heart for Middle-schoolers, which makes her a saint and well-appreciated by parents that's for sure. Check out her writings on her website: diannebeck.com 
Some gems:
A 5th grade teacher told me that I was a good writer. I never forgot her words.
The juvenile delinquents I taught to read just needed someone to come alongside and show them that someone cared.
Young people are embattled by social media, adding to their tension and confusion. 
We all need to live out of the confidence of being who God designed us to be. 
The written word stays long after we are gone: I want to write so that others know God loves them.
Staying in the Word is the key to remembering our true identity.

Ep 217 Blindspots and Birdfeeders with Bible teacher, Comedienne, Amberly Neese

Amberly Neese is all for Glee-ology as well as Theology. She loves making people laugh. I would say she can't help it. She knows, too, that truth goes down easier when prefaced with a good dose of humor and vulnerability. Author of three great Bible Studies including UNTANGLING FAITH: RECLAIMING HOPE INTHE QUESTIONS JESUS ASKED, Amberly helps people like you and me experience the freedom found in meaningful relationships with God and others. 
She's hosting a giveaway of UNTANGLING FAITH all week long - please leave comment below to be entered. 
Some gems from our conversation:
 
My favorite question that Jesus asked is: "Who do you say I am?" 
Humor drops defenses and helps whet our appetites for what God wants to teach us. 
I had to let go of the false notion that God only is concerned with me when I'm doing things right. 
I want people to know that God is for them by the way that I love and honor them.
We develop a specific muscle group in our minds each time we recall how God loves and provides: He does so for birds—he will do the same for us, His children.
When my adult children need help, instead of rushing to their aid, I ask, "What do you know to be true?"
Jesus asked over 300 questions as recorded in Scripture. Since He knew all the answers the questions were for you and I to help us grow in faith and love. 
 
 
Amberly is a featured speaker/ emcee/ comedian for the Aspire Women’s Events and Marriage Date Night, two popular Christian national tours.
She and her husband have two adult children and live in Prescott, Arizona, where they enjoy the great outdoors, the Food Network, and all things Star Wars.
I got to meet and hear Amberly in October. What a treat!

Ep 216 Reframing Our Suffering with Colleen Swindoll Thompson

Colleen Swindoll Thompson speaks today about "reframing her pain" and what she didn't learn in Sunday School. "We don't like to hear that life includes suffering," Thompson states, "and that modeling how to suffer well is the best legacy we can leave our children." She was raised well and she figured if she did "her part for God and with God" she'd be okay. But she wasn't.
Through multiple difficult and tragic circumstances, she learned to lean in toward God and allow Him to do his refining work, and all of it helped her establish "Reframing Ministries"—an organization to bless, encourage and support the caregiver.
Colleen will be giving away a copy of her book When Life Isn't Fair: What They Didn't Tell You in Sunday School this week. Leave a comment below or on social media to be entered to win. 
Some gems from our conversation:
God's way is so different from what we plan—so much bigger and better but we don't see that right away.
I was raised with the idea that if I do my part, God would give me an abundant life without suffering.
I want to leave a legacy of listening well because that means I'm loving well.
How I treat others that God has entrusted into my care takes vulnerability and the willingness to ask for help.
We can face our challenges and trials either by fighting with God, asking "Why, God?" and trying to fix things on our own or by asking Him, "What do I do now? You've given me this day and these trials—I need help." 
God knows you: your health, your emotions, your relationships—all the things—and He will supply the person or persons that you need when you need it.
When we find ourselves stuck, not knowing how to move forward, the first step is to acknowledge our need; then pray, "Lord, I don't know what to do."
God doesn't say, "I need to you do" as much as "I need you to be"—close to me, crying out for help and resting in His presence.
Sign up for Colleen's 5-Day Patio Videos Devotional Series HERE.
View Colleen's story here or here.
Do you know a caregiver who would be encouraged by this podcast? Please share the link today.
 
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Maybe someone in your neighborhood needs to hear Colleen's message of reframing. If I don't know my neighbor, it's hard to love them as Jesus loves them. You can start by hosting a coffee. This printable can get you on your way, including two simple recipes (I only do simple)—
 
 

Ep 215 How to Live On Mission in Your Neighborhood with Twyla Franz

When Twyla's daughters say, "Are we walking the neighborhood or talking the neighborhood?" she knows she's been passing down a legacy worth living. She says drawing close to God is the first step in loving our neighbors and some of her favorite words begin with "R."
Twyla Franz is a big believer in baby steps and ripple-effect living. An Enneagram 9 learning to live open, she loves front-yard conversations with neighbors, chalk-painted furniture, and Yogi’s blueberry tea. As a missional neighboring guide, she helps others get close to Jesus and grow deep, missional friendships with neighbors. Find her words (written and recorded) on TheUncommonNormal.com. Other places Twyla writes include (in)courage, Relevant, Her View From Home, and The Grit and Grace Project. She also hosts Begin Within: A Gratitude Series to encourage year-round gratitude (because gratitude, she says, has a ripple effect.)
 
Some gems:
So often we complicate our faith instead of just living the rhythms of drawing close to Jesus and allowing him to ripple out onto our neighbors.
To live missional is to live "interruptible."
When we make ourselves vulnerable, we become approachable so that the Good News naturally or supernaturally pours out.
My preference is not to ask for help but I find that makes me real and makes Jesus real to my neighbor.
I know God differently on my knees than anywhere else.
When I know where the goal is, I keep inching my way forward; I don't have to get there overnight. 
God's abundance isn't only for us, it's for how it flows over and out of our lives for those we meet everyday.
Whatever we hope to do in our neighborhood, we need to start in our homes. 
A piece of our purpose is to thank God every day in our hearts and in the presence of others. 
 
Free sample week of Cultivating a Missional Life: A 30-Day Devotional to Gently Help You Open Your Heart, Home, and Life to Your Neighbors
And,
Find out if you are accidentally keeping your friendships shallow—and what you can do about it
 
Find Twyla in all these places:
Website—https://theuncommonnormal.com/
Cultivating a Missional Life Devotional https://theuncommonnormal.com/book/
Freebies (including sample week of devotional)—https://theuncommonnormal.com/subscribe/
Begin Within: A Gratitude Series—https://theuncommonnormal.com/category/gratitude-series/
Podcast—https://theuncommonnormal.com/podcast/
Instagram—https://www.instagram.com/theuncommonnormal/
Facebook—https://www.facebook.com/theuncommonnormal
 

Ep 214 A Legacy of the Sacredness of Work: How Your Job Matters for Eternity with Jordan Raynor

Jordan Raynor returns to Living a Legacy Life Podcast today to talk about his radical and biblical view of our work, all of our work, and how it matters to God and to eternity. Jordany is the leading voice on work and faith and you may have been first introduced to his writing with his great books, Created to Create and Redeeming Your Time (Hear our conversation about that HERE.)
Today he addresses our misconceptions of our work, our view of heaven as well as the Great Commission as most of us know it. Join us as we tackle these great topics from his latest book:
The Sacredness of Secular Work: 4 Ways Your Job Matters for Eternity (Even When You're Not Sharing the Gospel)
 
You will be motivated and blessed. OH! And he's giving one away so be sure to leave a comment below to be entered. 
So many convo gems:
We know our jobs matter to God: His one and only Son, Jesus was raised in the home of a small business owner!
We live with too many half-truths about heaven. 
The first commission is to make the world more useful for people's benefit and enjoyment.
God delights in every detail of our lives, most of which includes our work. 
Our work is a vehicle for bringing God eternal pleasure.
The Great Commission is great but it's not the only thing that God values. 
The Gospel includes the redemption of the earth, not only the salvation of our souls. 
Make a list of questions that will launch conversations from the surface, to the serious, to the spiritual and keep them in your phone.
 
Follow Jordan at jordanraynor.com
 Podcasts and books.
 
 
 

Ep 213 A Legacy of Coming Alongside with Authentic Hospitality with Alyssa Evans

Alyssa Evans never met her dad and was raised in a foster home, then adopted. It wasn't until she had her first child that she decided to embrace faith in Christ. And found her "forever family." As a military wife (Marines!) she's moved countless times and struggled often with loneliness that is typical with military families. she compared herself (a little bit!) with Jesus since his fulltime ministry was 3 years and a typical military duty is 3 years where families need to uproot again, find new friends for themselves and their kids. Alyssa and her husband want to continue ministering to the military family unit in some way after his retirement which is not that far away. 
Some gems from our conversation: 
Women become incredibly isolated when they uproot every three years or so and they need someone to come alongside and just be with them.
We want to love people with the same love that Jesus loves us.
Our church knew we wouldn't be sticking around because of the military so their attitude was: "Hey! We don't care how long you're staying and if it's a short time, it just means we will love you harder!"
The least I can do is invite someone to my table.
If there are snacks for the kids, sometimes that's all that's needed to gather women around my table (and by snacks I mean a big bowl of popcorn and another one of cereal.)
I find that as we get older, we're so busy with our older kids, we don't take time to develop our women friendships. We need to put it on the calendar.
When I'm feeling blue and lonely, I've learned that if I'm invited somewhere that I say, "Yes!" no matter what. 
The Lord has more for me and he humbles and sustains us. 
When wallowing in loneliness, I've learned to stop saying, "Why, Lord?" and changing it to, "Lord, what will You have me learn from this situation?"
When I'm authentic with my story, it deepens a new friendship and lets another know there is room at my table.
 
 

Ep 212 A Legacy of Recalibrating Your Life with Jenny Abel

Free lance writer, editor, mother of two, Jenny Abel talks today on the preciousness of recalibrating your life, all for heaven's sake. Co-author with Kenneth Boa of the book, Recalibrate Your Life: Navigating Transitions with Purpose and Hope, Abel defines recalibration as consciously processing where we've been, where we are now, and looking ahead to where God may want to lead us. "This isn't something we only do at the end of our lives," Jenny says, "rather we do it on a regular basis to help us gain perspective: Are we numbering our days to gain a heart of wisdom?"
Leave a comment below or on social media to be entered to win a copy of Recalibrate Your Life.
Teach us to number our days,    that we may gain a heart of wisdom.
Psalm 90:12
Some gems:
At the heart of recalibration is a pilgrim mindset.
Before we can recalibrate, we need to calibrate: do we belong to God? Are our minds set on Christ?
My relationship with God would not be what it is without my time in the dark valley of infertility.
Knowing you are really going to die someday changes everything.
Our career changes; the calling on our lives is never ending.
Suffering prompts recalibration.
My desire is to inspire others to know and hope in God and call them to gaze on God's beauty.
Our pride, our day-to-day inertia, digging in our heels—all of these things keep us from numbering our days. 
Jenny Abel is an editor and writer for Ken Boa, coauthor of Recalibrate Your Life. Having sat under Boa’s teaching since she was a teenager, she began working for him and his Reflections Ministries in 2013. She served as editor of the monthly Reflections teaching letter from 2017 to 2023. She cowrote Shaped by Suffering and A Guide to Practicing God’s Presence with Dr. Boa and edited his book Life in the Presence of God. A freelance writer and editor, she founded Jenny M. Abel Editorial Services (www.abeleditorial.com) in 2011. She holds a BS in mathematics with a concentration in Latin American studies from Furman University, is a graduate of the Focus on the Family Leadership Institute, and resides in Charlottesville, Virginia, with her husband, Ben, and their two young children.
 
Book web page: http://recalibrateyourlife.org
 
Ken Boa’s website: http://kenboa.org  
Ken’s social media: Reflections Ministries - YouTube, Facebook, Kenneth Boa (@ken.boa) • Instagram photos and videos
 
 
AND, Jenny shared a recipe! Yay! I'm not sure I'd decrease the butter, but that's just me. Thanks, Jenny!
Grand Canyon Coffee CakePart 1:
¾ c. canola or vegetable oil2½ c. flour*¾ c. sugar1 c. brown sugar (light or dark)1 tsp. nutmeg1 tsp. saltPart 2:
2 tsp. cinnamon2 eggs, beaten1 c. buttermilk1 tsp. baking powder1 tsp. baking soda1 stick butter
Directions:
Preheat oven to 350° F. Combine Part 1 ingredients and mix thoroughly (in an electric mixer).Take ¾ c. of this mixture and set it aside.Part 2: To the set-aside mixture, add 2 tsp. cinnamon. This will serve as the topping. To the restof the Part 1 mixture, add eggs, buttermilk, powder, and soda. Pour into the bottom of a greased 9” x13” pan. Sprinkle the topping crumbles on top, distributing evenly. Bake 25–30 min. or until toothpickcomes out clean.Melt the 1 stick butter and drizzle on top of the hot cake. Serve warm for breakfast or anytime!*Note: I often use whole wheat flour for all or part of this case to make it healthier. I also decrease theamount of butter drizzled on top to about ½ to 2/3 of a stick.
 

Ep 211 A Legacy of People and Grace, Plus Mom Stories with Sue Donaldson

When God said, “Be hospitable” he added a caveat which could only be divine: “And while you’re at it, don’t be grumpy.” It’s easy to be grumpy because hospitality is work especially if you don’t think you are very good at it. Some people are really great hosts. We describe them as “good at entertaining.” But God didn’t say, “Be good entertainers.” There’s a difference. Seems to me that entertaining has more to do with me and hospitality has more to do with my guests
My friend told me that the hardest part of hospitality is trying too hard to impress with appearance and presentation instead of being genuinely warm and welcoming.  Emphasizing these things can leave her feeling superficial and flat rather than warm, loving and satisfied.  She said, "I have to remind myself that entertaining is not the same thing as hospitality.   I need to slow down and take time to nurture relationships." 
She's right. I need to remind myself of the same thing, especially when I end up running around at the last minute, barking orders at the family to help me finish whatever isn’t, and making a general mess of a kind and loving atmosphere - - all in the name of “making things nice for the company.
Mom was raised in the ungrace of no hospitality. But she wanted to help people know that they were a big deal to God by inviting them over for strawberry jello and baked chickens in the blue roaster on time-bake on Sundays. So she kept inviting and that’s how she broke that chain and raised all us Moore kids with grace enough to do the same only I don’t usually make jello and often I buy the pie. We all know how to make coffee. Thank you, Mom.
   Karen Mains wrote:  "True hospitality comes before pride.  It has nothing to do with impressing people, but everything to do with making them feel welcome and wanted." 
Some thoughts from today's episode:
God wants to use our hospitality as a vehicle for Him to change lives – our lives and those we invite.
True hospitality is "relationship-based" rather than "show-off based."
The more I accept that grace, the easier it is for me to give grace to everyone else. I think that’s called love.
Hospitality can get confused with Entertaining. Both are great – both can be used by God – but they are not the same.
God is interested in me, but when I invite someone over, he wants me to show my guests that he’s interested in them.
If one is truly hospitable, one shows graciousness, courtesy, and genuine kindness--all qualities of our loving God. Someone can show these qualities without owning table settings for twelve with matching linen napkins.
There is no one more hospitable than God, and we are to be His welcome to the world.
Great food, good times, a gorgeous home—is that what hospitality is all about? 
God makes room even when no one else does, and sometimes in the most unlikely places. Sometimes we just need to make room so that someone becomes part of the Bigger Story.
 
 

Ep 210 A Legacy of Simple Connecting in the Holidays with Carol Feil

Welcome Carol Feil of Yellow Boot Fame to Legacy Living today! We talk about what matters most during the busy holiday season and we laugh a lot, too! People are lonelier than ever and how can we include rather than exclude to help others connect to a family, even if for one evening? Sometimes choosing "simple" over "elaborate" is the best gift we can give our own families as well as ourselves so we can focus on what really matters and choose to make this time a sacred space. 
Some Carol gems:
Simplifying allows us to focus on what's most important durlng the holidays.
Love can mean learning to give someone what they are willing to receive.
I've discovered that doing things that help our family connect is more valuable than buying more gifts and putting on elaborate events.
Our "shoulds" are not always grounded in reality.
My family was happier with less; I had to learn to expect less of myself.
I taught my children that we aren't purposely exclusive when we are purposely inclusive, but we have to look out for that one who is feeling excluded by our inclusivity. 
We "should" ourselves into doing more when it only adds more stress and no one else is expecting it--only us.
A gift from Carol, first a word:
I love everything about Christmas - well, almost everything.  Tinsel and holly, yes. Stress and overwhelm, no.  Coco and caroling, yes.  Overloaded calendar, no. 
You get the idea.  It's easy to overcommit, overdo, then overwhelm ourselves as Christmas approaches.  How often does the schedule dictate what you focus on?
I have learned that by choosing what goes on the calendar in advance, I can simplify, stay sane so I can focus on the Sacred of the Season. 
I want this for you, too. I've created a FREE resource to remind you: You have permission to choose sane and simple so Sacred can be the focus.
Carol wears yellow-boots in the garden - they are her “listen & learn”boots. She takes pictures of everything! Slugs & bugs & selfies! But,her grandkids are her favorite to frame.She will tell you growth in life is good and gardens are proof. Shebelieves God grows us where we are and helps us to be rooted andgrounded in His unchanging character. He knows our pain and loves usmore than we can imagine.Let Carol encourage you today, so you too, can plant a seed of hopefor another tomorrow.You can find Carol through her website www.carolfeil.com, on Instagramand Facebook.